Dr. Nerdlove, giver of excellent advice, breaks down what it means when we have sex dreams about people we aren't in a relationship with. Those dreams, which can be both exciting & disturbing, are simply our brains doing what they do. Just like thoughts, dreams don't have to mean anything. Sex dreams are only a problem when we decide to make them a problem.
"This is something that a lot of people get wrong about monogamy:
being in a monogamous relationship means that you choose not to have sex with other people;
it doesn’t mean you won’t want to. And that desire for other people?
That is entirely, perfectly and utterly 100% normal.
It doesn’t mean say anything about the strength of your relationship,
the depths of your devotion or how happy you are.
It just means that you’ve got a libido and your libido is doing what libidos do:
perking up whenever someone who hits your buttons comes by."