A Better Way To Talk To Yourself

Psychology Today magazine revisits the topic of self-talk & how it impacts our mental health in the May 2015 issue. We already know that what we say to ourselves makes a meaningful difference in terms of how we feel. What's new is the notion that how we refer to ourselves also matters as well. While it might feel a big awkward to refer to yourself in the third person, it might actually be incredibly useful to drop the pronouns in favor of our own names.

"How people conduct their inner monologues has an enormous effect on their success in life. Talk to yourself with the pronoun I, for instance, and you’re likely to fluster and perform poorly in stressful circumstances. Address yourself by your name and your chances of acing a host of tasks, from speech making to self-advocacy, suddenly soar. 

When dealing with strong emotions, taking a step back and becoming a detached observer can help. It’s very easy for people to advise their friends, yet when it comes to themselves, they have trouble. But people engaging in this process, using their own first name, are distancing themselves from the self, right in the moment, and that helps them perform.”

https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/201505/the-voice-reason?collection=1073568

A Little Pause Goes A Long Way

Over at Buzzfeed, Nathan Pyle nicely illustrates with some simple visuals the often over-looked  importance of pausing before speaking. It's a simple habit we could probably all stand to benefit from. As a visual thinker myself, this handful of images will stick in my mind the next time I'm talking to someone else.

http://www.buzzfeed.com/nathanwpyle/this-is-why-i-pause-before-i-speak?bffb&utm_term=4ldqpgp#.agz8w0ANE

21 Ways To Just So "No"

It's just a little word, two letters, and yet saying "no" to others can be one of the most challenging  things to get out of our mouths. Dr. Christine Carter, sociologist, happiness expert, & Senior Fellow over at the Greater Good Science Center has come up with 21 ways to say no. So, surely you can say yes to at least one of these strategies. 

http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/21_ways_to_give_good_no

Fear Not Feedback

Unstuck, a wealth of smart & well-designed tips about how to live life better, tackles the subject of how to take the fear out of getting feedback. Even constructive criticism can be hard to take sometimes. It's a natural reaction to get defensive or offended. Are you a Wallower, Stonewaller, or Bristler? Maybe a combo? Regardless, Unstuck has 7 questions you can ask yourself to help turn feedback into a true learning experience.
 

 

http://unstuckcommunity.tumblr.com/post/102009654190/how-to-take-the-fear-out-of-feedback?utm_source=Unstuck+Newsletter&utm_campaign=b4f34b5a0b-11_11_2014_weekly_campaign11_10_2014&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_3e6a287fb8-b4f34b5a0b-335460297