It's easy to judge others from the comfort of our own selves. Ultimately though, we only cause ourselves more stress & suffering when we get in the habit of casting judgments. Luckily, like any habit, it can be broken. Here's 10 ways to start seeing people non-judgmentally.
A collection of my own thoughts as well as excellent finds from all across the internet...
While it's generally becoming understood that light-emitting screens can cause problems when it's time to go to sleep, we're just now beginning to realize the longer-term impact that may come when we take our screens to bed with us. The chronic suppression of melatonin has been linked to increased risk of various cancers, obesity & diabetes.
Dr. Christine Carter shares 3 simple ways to deal with the difficult person (or people) in your life. Bear in mind, simple doesn't always mean easy...
"How come your family knows how to push your buttons?
Because they installed them."
"We are very excited to announce that we launched a brand new website in the family of IOCDF sites this week, a resource dedicated to information about Body Dysmorphic Disorder. The website contains resources for individuals with BDD, their family members, and mental health professionals. Our hope is to continue and expand the site with more stories of hope and recovery.
We would like to thank Denis Asselin for pushing for the creation of this important new website, and to our entire BDD Special Interest Group, led by Dr. Katharine Phillips, Dr. Sabine Wilhelm, and Dr. Fugen Neziroglu, for the contributions of their time and expertise."
Trouble falling or staying asleep? This simple sleep hack from Science Of Us might help do the trick. Try putting a foot (or both feet) outside the covers to help better regulate your overall body temperature so it's more conducive to sleepy time. If you're like me, that means getting over the childhood fear that the monster under the bed could get your feet if they're not covered, but maybe that risk is worth the reward of a good night's sleep.
Sometimes the best way to learn about & understand the recommended treatment for obsessive-compulsive disorder is to hear directly from someone who has been through it. Melanie Lefebvre gives us her personal experience of exposure therapy & how it's helped her manage her OCD, which centers around intrusive thoughts that she's hit someone with her car.
Brain Balance's blog this week provides helpful information in discerning the differences between a temper tantrum & a sensory meltdown, which can look similar from the outside but are truly two different experiences.
One of my all-time favorite autistic bloggers has posted more wise words, this time on the nature of reasonable v. unreasonable IEP goals for kids on the spectrum. The whole thing is definitely worth a read, as she points out that much of what is expected from autistic children couldn't be managed by autistic adults. What is needed are not arbitrary, neurotypical goal posts, but rather goals in service of actual accomplishment.
What makes a goal unreasonable? Here are some patterns that I identified:
- Unreasonable goals prioritize “normalization” or compliance over objectives that benefit the student (like having a means of communication).
- Unreasonable goals don’t recognize autistic body language and socialization preferences as valid.
- Unreasonable goals don’t acknowledge as a valid and accommodate the student’s areas of disability.
- Unreasonable goals demand more from a young student than the average autistic adult is capable of.
It's just a little word, two letters, and yet saying "no" to others can be one of the most challenging things to get out of our mouths. Dr. Christine Carter, sociologist, happiness expert, & Senior Fellow over at the Greater Good Science Center has come up with 21 ways to say no. So, surely you can say yes to at least one of these strategies.
Dr. Michael Grander, who is board-certifed in Behavioral Sleep Medicine, has learned that when it comes to waking up in the middle of the night, the color of a night light can make a big difference when you return to bed & try to return to sleep. (Apparently, I need to go exchange mine.) Happy sleeping!
Unstuck, a wealth of smart & well-designed tips about how to live life better, tackles the subject of how to take the fear out of getting feedback. Even constructive criticism can be hard to take sometimes. It's a natural reaction to get defensive or offended. Are you a Wallower, Stonewaller, or Bristler? Maybe a combo? Regardless, Unstuck has 7 questions you can ask yourself to help turn feedback into a true learning experience.
Tim Hoch over at Thought Catalog put together this nice piece outlining 10 things we do that make our own lives harder. The good news? Once we know which ones we're doing, we can choose to do something else. Ready? Go.
That's right, I said social introverts. Introverts need people to (sometimes), but those social needs can be easily misread by those on the more extraverted end of the spectrum. Abby Rosmarin over at Thought Catalog lists her top 15 struggles only social introverts will understand.
We humans are pretty darn good at doing the kind of mental gymnastics required to help us avoid the hard work of expanding our comfort zones. In a very frank essay, Tracy Moore points out the various logic loopholes our brains will exploit that keep us from growing as people & experiencing more meaning & happiness in life. Recognize any of these in your own life?
Leo Babauta returns with a simple yet intriguing idea for helping us reclaim what really matters to us in life, which can be hard to see as the daily distractions add up over time, obstructing our view.
Instead of thinking, "How can I get rid of this complicated mess?" Let's ask, "What if I started with a blank slate?" What would you do if your life were...an empty container, with limited space, what would you put in it?
Our friends across the pond in the UK have created this list of 9 myths about OCD that provides a good factual overview of the disorder & what those who suffer from it face on a daily basis as well as what is & isn't helpful for them.
"A lack of social skills does not mean a lack of interest in socializing."
This excellent blog post from a 21 year-old awareness-raising Aspie in Yorkshire, who provides 10 very important insights to keep in mind when it comes to romantic relationships on the autism spectrum.
In this post, Daniel, aka OCD Andy, takes a moment to reflect upon the "perfect imperfection" of his inspiration stones & how they inspire him on a daily basis to practice the sometimes challenging art of acceptance.
Dr. Monnica Williams, Director of the Center for Mental Health Disparities in the Department of Psychological & Brain Sciences at the University of Louisville, suggests thinking about OCD as the "third person in a marriage" - causing difficulties for both the person with OCD & the person married to them.
When OCD shows up, the best thing a couple can do is present a united front against it. Both people need to learn what OCD is, how it works & how to challenge it. It's can be hard, but ultimately worth it.